Evil Angel
by lightblue-Nymphadora
Summary: Pansy thought she wanted to be a Death Eater. Now she just wants someone to rescue her. Rated for violence and suggestive themes. Will include Tonks/Pansy femslash in later chapters.
1. Intro

**Evil Angel**

Pansy flinched as someone switched on the lamp next to her bed. Trying to keep her breathing even, she listened as Bellatrix shuffled things around in her closet. When she had first arrived at Castle Lestrange, she'd been astounded that You-Know-Who's second in command would do anything even vaguely maternal as picking out her clothes. It was more out of necessity than affection, however, since Bellatrix dictated the way in which Pansy spent her summer days. Lying there, listening to the sliding of hangers and drawers, she remembered the previous summer. She'd lounged, traveled, listened to Draco's boasts about working for Him, and begged her father to let her join the Death Eaters. A year of this and he'd sent her to stay with Bellatrix and Rodolphus. All she'd wanted was the brand, and she'd gotten a full view of how insane her life was to be. From the "teaching" (more pureblood dogma) to the "training sessions" (read- torture), Pansy was now surviving on sheer willpower. Hate the work though she now did, she'd be damned if she was going to let Draco's aunt get the better of her. A soft hand gripped her shoulder, not hard enough to hurt but enough to get her attention.

"I know you're awake."

"Yes, Bellatrix."

"Get dressed. Dinky will have your breakfast when you go downstairs. You may do as you like until two o'clock; then we'll be training."

"Yes, Bellatrix." Pansy tried to keep the disappointment out of her voice. Training sessions were supposedly to build Pansy's pain tolerance, since Aurors were allowed to use Unforgivables during questioning. She had a feeling that they were really just a way for Bellatrix to get in her daily fix of Cruciatus without having to go out and find victims. After all, good Death Eaters don't get caught…Pansy rolled out of bed and grabbed her outfit for the day. Black pants and a black polo shirt—training was going to be brutal, and possibly bloody. She shook the fear out of her and tapped the showerhead with her wand. Stepping into the warm spray she prayed for today's session to be quick, but she knew better. There was no such thing as an easy way out when Bellatrix was involved.

* * *

The grip on the wand tightened. Somewhere in the back of Pansy's mind, she reminded herself not to break it. It was hard. Squeezing her wand was the only thing keeping her from crying; she was way past crying. The curse lifted, leaving Pansy with an intense tingling feeling in her limbs. She lay there gasping for breath, and heard Bellatrix walking over to her. She kept her eyes closed, still panting, even as the older woman kneeled at her side and placed a hand on her stomach and asked, "What did you do wrong?"

There were a million and four answers to that question, Pansy thought. She was wrong when she decided to date Draco. She was wrong to listen to his and Lucius' arrogant ramblings about You-Know-Who and how close they were to him. She was wrong to beg to be a Death Eater. Most of all, she was wrong to think she could be anything like Bellatrix. But to Bellatrix's question she answered, "I…I wasn't fast enough."

"Well that's obvious," Bellatrix said coldly. She ran her wand over Pansy's body, alleviating enough pain for the girl to think. "Explain."

"I let my guard down when you paused," Pansy said, sitting up. "I couldn't get my speed up quick enough…"

"Correct. You won't do that again."

"No, Bellatrix."

"Up." The older witch pulled Pansy up by the collar and pushed her to the other side of the room. "Again."


	2. The Death Eaters

**Evil Angel**

Pansy set her book on the bed as she heard Bellatrix greet one of the Death Eaters. Tonight was, thankfully, just a party. That meant You-Know-Who wouldn't be there and Pansy wouldn't have to stay long. She walked quietly to the door and smiled when she heard the deep, slightly petulant voice of her boyfriend.

"Where will the meeting be, Aunt?" Draco asked.

"The lounge. Tell Rodolphus to send for more wine when you get there."

"Yes Aunt."

Closing the door to her room, Pansy tiptoed back over to her bed. She was never allowed at meetings since she hadn't taken the Mark yet. She picked up her book and was halfway through the chapter when Bellatrix entered.

"The guests are here, but the party won't begin for a while yet. I'll send Dinky to fetch you when it is time."

"Yes Bellatrix."

Without another word, the older wich left. Pansy waited for another ten minutes before pulling on her knee socks and slipping from the room. She walked over to the back staircase's landing and knelt by the vent. Through it she could hear snippets of conversation—Muggle body counts, people restrained by the Imperius Curse, and other "triumphs" from the past week. Bored, Pansy was about to leave, until she heard,

"What about the girl? Parkinson's kid?"

Her heart pounded. This life wasn't what she wanted, but part of her couldn't help wondering if they would even give her the chance.

"She'll be ready to take the Mark soon," Rodolphus answered smoothly.

"Not too soon," Bellatrix said. "She still hasn't proven herself as far as I'm concerned, and—"

"You haven't had enough fun with your plaything?" Malfoy asked coldly.

"And," Bellatrix continued, "I think she should be given a small assignment, to be sure she is indeed committed and ready."

"Of course," Rodolphus agreed.

There was a general murmur of assent and Pansy guessed they were almost finished. She walked silently back to her room and tried to read again, but found she couldn't. Her mind was spinning with what she'd just heard. So, she was to be tested. Hopefully it was sooner rather than later, because the training sessions were killing her. She'd figured out quickly that this was not the glamorous life she'd imagined, but anything was better than what she was doing now.

"Miss Pansy," a squeaky voice said, "Mistress Bellatrix wishes Dinky to fetch you. The party has started."

Pansy slipped into her shoes and followed the house elf down to the dining room. Before she entered, however, a hand shot out from a small alcove and pulled her in.

"I forgot to heal you," Bellatrix said, looming over her. "Be still." She traced her wand around Pansy's face, healing the bruises. "There, now you look presentable."

"Who's here tonight?" Pansy asked.

"The usual group. My sister and her family, Avery, Nott, the Carrows, and Goyle. I believe Draco wants a word with you." She pointed to where the boy was standing in the corner and Pansy nodded.

When Pansy made it over to him, he forestalled her attempt at a hug. "I have to tell you something," he said in a low voice. "We're done, okay? You and I."

"What?" Pansy asked. "Where the hell is this coming from?"

"Look, don't be stupid," he said in a harsh whisper. "I used to think I might get lucky and make it through this shit, but I won't. You definitely won't. There's no point in us acting like everything's normal. Even if our side wins, we won't be around to see it. The Aurors are just waiting for Slytherins, Junior Death Eaters to pick off. We'll be first when we go back to Hogwarts, if we get back to Hogwarts."

"Piss off, they can't prove anything," Pansy sneered. "Look, if you want out, fine. But don't give me this doom and despair act. We're kids, and we're not convicted Death Eaters. We've got a better chance at surviving than most."

"Goodbye, Pansy," Draco said, walking across the room and through the door.

* * *

An hour later, Pansy was halfway through her third glass of mead, and seriously considering getting drunk off her tits. Unfortunately, this wasn't proper pureblood behavior and Bellatrix would kill her. Creatively. Over a period.

"I hears yer on the mar-kit again," said a wheezy voice in her ear.

"I'm not 'on the market', Amycus," Pansy said.

"I hears the Malfoy boy don't want nothin' to do witcher now. So the way I sees it, ya are."

"Not for you." Pansy gave him a disgusted look and walked over to Bellatrix. "May I retire?" she asked.

Bellatrix looked hard at her for a moment, as if debating telling her something. Finally, she nodded and said, "You may."

"Thank you. Good night."

* * *

Pansy wasn't sure how long she'd slept for, but she registered two things when she woke. First, it wasn't morning, and second, Bellatrix was there. The older woman was running a hand through Pansy's hair, so the visit couldn't be good. As a rule, physical contact with Bellatrix usually boded ill.

"I know you're awake," she said.

"Yes, Bellatrix," Pansy answered, opening her eyes. She winced as Bellatrix's grip on her hair tightened.

"What were you doing listening to our meeting?" she asked. "I know you were there. I heard you leave."

"I—ah!" Pansy cried as Bellatrix pulled.

"I don't like spies."

"I wasn't…I didn't mean to upset you. You know how much I want to serve Him! I just wanted to know what was going on!" Pansy lied, hoping Bellatrix wasn't in the mood for Legilimency that night.

Bellatrix let go of her hair with a snort. "Don't do that again."

"Yes, Bellatrix."


	3. A Test

**Evil Angel**

"Miss Pansy, you is wanted in the lounge."

"Thank you, Pokey."

The lounge was where Bellatrix liked to work when they weren't training, so Pansy wasn't particularly worried as she made her way down the stairs. She had a pleasant surprise when she found not Bellatrix, but Rodolphus in the small room.

"Hello, Rodolphus," she said with a curtsy. Other than Malfoy, Rodolphus was the only Death Eater she respected enough to curtsey to. Her contact with him was minimal, probably because he wasn't cruel to her, but she enjoyed his company.

"Hello, Pansy. Bellatrix is out on an errand, but she told me I could talk to you. Have a seat."

Pansy sat across from him.

"We have an assignment for you. Nothing bi, just a little errand to make sure you're ready to take the Mark. Personally, I think you're ready now, but Bellatrix and Malfoy insist on this little test."

"Yes, Rodolphus. What would you have me do?"

"In my vault at Gringotts, there are two very powerful magical items that we will need in the next week. The first is a helmet. Goblin made, set with rubies around the top. It's the only one on the left shelf, so you shouldn't have a problem finding it. The second should be right beside the helmet. A silver orb with diamonds around the center. When you get them, be sure to levitate them into the bag, as they are cursed. Understand?"

"Yes, Rodolphus."

"Good. The second part of the assignment is of a more…delicate nature, shall we say? At the Apothecary in Knockturn Alley, there is a witch by the name of Anastasia Grizzleplurb. She's been toying with the prices of some very necessary items, and her arrogance needs to be checked. We need you to go and…er…make her see reason."

"How?"

"You're a creative girl." He smiled at her, standing up. "I'm sure you'll come up with something. Now, I'm leaving for a breakfast with Nott. Be a good girl and get started on your assignment. You can Apparate, yes?"

"Yes."

"Very well. Dinky will have your breakfast by now, I'm sure. Be on your way after that." He Summoned a sheet of parchment and a small purse from the counter. "Here's the list of things to pick up at the Apothecary when you're done with Anastasia. The key to the vault is in the purse and you can have whatever money is leftover. You remember what to get?"

"Yes, Rodolphus. The helmet and the orb on the left shelf."

"Very well. I shall see you tonight." With a bow, he exited the room.

Pansy sat for a while holding the list. Dinky came in and set her breakfast tray on the table. Absently, Pansy nibbled a bit of toast as she looked at the list. None of the stuff was especially telling. They could be making anything with this stuff. Not bothering to finish her breakfast, Pansy ran back upstairs to her room and grabbed her bag. She put on her cloak and stuck the list in her pocket. Grabbing her wand, she Disapparated to Diagon Alley.

She reappeared outside of Gringotts and walked slowly up the marble steps. She nodded at the goblins guarding the doors and walked inside to one of the first counters. "Hello," she said. "I need to go to a vault." She handed the goblin (Lockwick) the key, and he looked hard at her.

After a moment, he hopped off the stool and beckoned her to follow. They got into a cart and went careening down through the cavern. She felt a chill after they passed through the concealment revealer, but that seemed to make her goblin guide more secure. "Almost there," he told her. She figured they were, since Bellatrix's vault was only a bit after the revealer. Another couple minutes later, the cart came to a sudden stop. Taking a deep breath to calm her stomach, Pansy stepped out of the cart. She stood back as Lockwick unlocked the vault and the doors slid open. The two items she was after stood out right away. She Summoned both of them into the bag and said, "That'll be all."

"Very well," Lockwick said, nodding.

Fifteen minutes later, Pansy was strolling down Knockturn Alley wondering how the hell she was going to get this witch to listen to her. She peeked into the Apothecary, taking in the details and looking Anastasia over. Immediately, Pansy was glad she'd grown up in a pureblood house. The upbringing of always having to stay silent and in the shadows had given her an impressive knack for being able to read people in an instant. She knew a cheating wife when she saw one. No scorned woman hummed and smiled while she was working unless she was looking forward to, or had just gotten, something better. With more confidence than Draco after a hair styling appointment, she walked into the Apothecary.

"Hello," she said.

"No Death Eater business today, young lady," the elderly witch snapped, losing the happy countenance instantly.

"I'm not a Death Eater."

"That's what they all say."

"No, really," Pansy said, rolling back her left sleeve. She licked her middle and index fingers and dragged them across her forearm. "See? No Mark, no makeup."

"Well, what do you want?"

"This list," Pansy said, handing it to her. "On regular market prices, if you please."

"I don't please. You come to my store, you pay my prices."

"You say you have Death Eaters in here?" Pansy asked in a low voice.

"All the time."

"I don't think they'd appreciate you fucking with the prices of ingredients. Moreover, I don't think they'd be able to forgive you conning an innocent pureblood child out of her money."

"Look kid, I've seen all types come through that door, and you're one of the least innocent."

Pansy smiled. "That may be, but that doesn't change the fact that you're conning purebloods. That could be seen as a slight against You-Know-Who, and I'm sure you wouldn't want a visit from Him."

"You're parents are Death Eaters, then?"

"Pansy Parkinson, at your service. Daughter of Xerses and Maxine Parkinson. Neither of them are Death Eaters, but that hardly matters these days."

"Hmmph…Listen kid, they've threatened me before and I'll tell you like I told them: He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named ain't got no time for a little store matter. Thirty-five galleons for the lot. I added a little for puttin' up with your cheek."

"Why doesn't your husband help you with the shop?" Pansy asked, reaching for her purse.

"Ain't none of your business, but he's in charge of the finances. He works out of Gringotts."

"Well, that must make everything so much easier for you. You don't have to worry about him walking in on you and your other man."

"WHAT? What's this you're saying?"

She said it in an offended tone, but Pansy saw the color drain from her face. "I know about these things. You were way too happy before I walked in to have only been doing inventory. Wonder what Mr. Grizzleplurb would say if he knew what he was married to."

"He'd never believe you!" the old woman snarled.

"Really?" Pansy asked with a laugh. "Sure he would. Let me tell you how it goes: you've been married a long time. There've been late nights were he says he's working, so you've got your suspicions. There've been days were he's come by and you've rushed out of the storeroom, claiming he startled you. He's got his suspicions. But both of you go on pretending it doesn't happen, because no one else knows. That right?"

"You're an evil little thing." The woman glared at her.

"I know," Pansy concurred. "How much was this again?"

"…Ten Galleons."

"Of course." Pansy set the money on the counter and grabbed her purchase, stuffing it in her bag. She turned and walked from the Apothecary. She was about to Disapparate when she saw a shock of purple disappear around a corner.

"Bellatrix," she muttered to herself. She'd figured they wouldn't just turn her loose. In a weird way, she felt a sense of pride that Bellatrix had seen everything. With a smile, she Disaparated.

* * *

"You did very well," Rodolphus said, smiling at Pansy. "Very well indeed, didn't she, Bella?"

"Yes, you did." Bellatrix didn't smile, but Pansy knew she was satisfied. "Come with me."

Pansy couldn't believe it. They were headed toward the training room. Surely Bellatrix wouldn't torture her after she'd completed her assignment. No, something else had to be going on. Whipped though he was, Rodolphus wouldn't have allowed it; Pansy was sure of that. When they reached the training room, Pansy could hear something. Bellatrix pushed her inside, and she saw a man tied up in the corner.

"Go ahead." Bellatrix smiled at her.

"You want me to kill him?" Pansy hoped she didn't sound as scared as she was.

Bellatrix kept smiling and shook her head. Wrapping an arm around Pansy's shoulders, she said, "No."

"What did he do?"

"Please, little girl, have mercy!" the man begged.

"He's been very vocal about his hatred of the Dark Lord. Do you like that attitude?"

"No," Pansy whispered.

"Why not?"

"Because I'm a pureblood. We were born to serve the Dark Lord and take our rightful place as rulers over Muggles and Mudbloods."

"Very good. I'll leave you to have fun. Don't kill him though," Bellatrix added, kissing Pansy's forehead. "I believe Alecto wants that honor." She swept from the room, closing the door behind her.

"Please, girl. I have a son…"

"_Crucio_."


	4. One Bad Weekend

**Evil Angel**

Pansy shivered as the water turned colder. All five shower heads were pouring water onto her. She wasn't especially dirty; she was just hoping all the water would drown out her crying. She'd put on enough of a show to satisfy her insane guardian, and had left the man to endure Alecto's torture. Not wanting Bellatrix to see or hear her crying, she'd claimed exhaustion and jumped into the shower. There was a knock at the door and Pansy jumped.

"Pansy?" Rodolphus called.

"Yes?"

"Come out. You've been in there for over an hour."

"I'll be out in a moment." Pansy grabbed her wand from the tub's edge and tapped each of the shower heads. She dried and dressed quickly, pulling her socks on as she went back into her bedroom.

Rodolphus was still there, sitting at her desk. "Are you alright?" he asked.

"Of course."

He smiled at this. Leaning back in the chair, he chuckled a bit. "Bellatrix is not a mother. Never forget that. Her approval is tied directly into the Dark Lord's. Since you have yet to take the Mark and actually work for him, you have been, and will continue to be, subjected to Bella's…high standards. And whatever you're trying to prove, know that you'll never be like her. You're much more of a Narcissa character than a Bellatrix."

"What do you mean?" Pansy asked.

"Until Alecto Carrow came along, Bella was the only female Death Eater. Narcissa, loyal though she is, would never take the Mark. She has the capability to care, it wouldn't work. Alecto has no one to care for, so she's a prime candidate for service."

"You can't tell me all of the male Death Eaters are heartless bastards," Pansy said with a grin.

Rodolphus laughed at her words. "No. But we have an easier time suppressing it." He looked hard at her for a moment. "Why do you want her approval so much?"

"I…I don't know. I didn't know it would be like this—" Pansy stopped herself before she said too much.

"You don't have to do this you know."

"I do. I'm involved now."

Rodolphus smiled sadly at her. She was right, and he knew it. "Come have lunch with me. You won't need to worry about good behavior; Bellatrix is at Narcissa's."

With a smile, Pansy followed him down to the dining room.

* * *

"To the Dark Lord," Malfoy said, raising his glass.

"The Dark Lord," the rest of them intoned.

Pansy was fuming. She'd done all that work and still hadn't gotten the Mark. They wanted her to go on a real mission with Rodolphus and Nott the next day, and she'd be given the Mark that night. She had, however, been invited to the meeting. She was sitting in between Bellatrix and Rodolphus, both adult with an arm around her shoulders. Bellatrix may have been lacking in maternal instincts, but when someone in her house was beginning to prove themselves she was damn well going to be proud of them. Even if she wasn't actually proud of Pansy, there were a lot more people there that night so she had to pretend. The party had been criminally dull so far. Nothing had gone on that week, all tonight consisted of was planning. They were looking at recruiting members abroad, so the conversation wasn't exactly riveting.

"Shall we allow the children to retire?" Rodolphus asked after the toast was finished..

"Yes, I think that would be best," Malfoy nodded. "You are excused, Draco."

"Draco, remind me to show you those crests the next time you're here," Rodolphus said.

"Yes, uncle. Goodnight."

"Goodnight everyone," Pansy said, following Draco. When they got to the foyer, Pansy stopped him.

"Are you staying here?"

"No. I'm Apparating back to the Manor."

"Goodnight then."

He left without replying. Pansy shook her head and walked back upstairs. She could hear the adults laughing downstairs. She changed into her nightclothes and sat at her desk to read. She was beginning to get tired when there was a knock at her door. It creaked open to reveal…

"Amycus? What do you want?" Pansy hopped off her chair as the man entered her room. She pulled her wand from under her book as he closed the door.

"You know."

"Get out of my room, _now_."

"So rude. I betcha wouldn't turn Rodolphus away so quickly."

"Piss off."

"Really I dunno why Bellatrix don't just kill ya off. She sees the way yer always followin' him round."

"Rodolphus is a good man, and a loyal servant. I respect him. Now get out of my room."

Amycus pulled out his wand, but Pansy disarmed him. Before she could congratulate herself, he tackled her onto the bed. She yelped and dropped her wand, and he put his hand over her mouth. She bit down.

"Yow!" he yelled. "You bitch!" He raised his hand to hit her, but the blow never fell.

When Pansy sat up, she saw Rodolphus in her doorway.

He lowered his wand and walked over to her. "Are you hurt at all?"

"N—no," Pansy whispered.

Rodolphus kicked Amycus, who struggled to a sitting position. "Get out of my house." Rodolphus growled.

The pudgy Death Eater retreated, and Rodolphus pulled Pansy into a hug.

She couldn't help herself; she cried. It only lasted a couple of minutes, however, because she heard,

"Rodolphus? Where are you? What happened to Amycus' face?"

"Shit!" Pansy said, and ran into the bathroom before Bellatrix entered. She scrubbed her face with cold water, hoping her eyes weren't puffy. She heard Rodolphus tell Bellatrix what had happened, and flinched when she heard the older witch knock on the door. "I was sick," she explained as she opened it.

"I could understand that," Bellatrix nodded. She looked disgusted at the very thought of Amycus. "He won't touch you again. You see what happens when we let our pureblood become diluted? He's not much more than an animal. Don't ever be fooled, Pansy. There are…lesser beings among our ranks. The Dark Lord is selective, but there are a few. They are useful in their own right, but they are stupid—as all mudbloods are. You know that, right?" Bellatrix gave her a severe look.

"Of course, Bellatrix."

"Go to bed. You have to be up early tomorrow."

* * *

"Stay close to me," Rodolphus whispered when they Apparated behind Flourish and Blotts.

Pansy nodded and the small group made their way into the street. Immediately, Rodolphus put his hand on her shoulder and drew his wand. The street was empty. Diagon Alley was never empty.

"_STUPEFY!" _

The Death Eaters ducked. They were surrounded. Rodolphus was lying unconscious next to Pansy. As the others fought, she jabbed him in the side with her wand, silently reviving him. She summoned his wand, which had landed a few feet away. "Go!" she said, handing it to him. She dueled with a Ministry wizard, sidestepping the curses flying from everyone else. Suddenly, she heard a sickening crack as the wizard hit her arm with a curse. She saw him raise his wand once more before her world went black.


	5. Prisoner of War

**Evil Angel**

Pansy stirred. The pale morning light was seeping through the window, making patterns on her face. The damp cell was freezing, and she wrapped the blanket tighter around her as she sat up. Any hope she had of another Death Eater breakout had long since vanished. She'd been in Azkaban for a week now, and hadn't heard so much as a rumor about one. Anyone who thought Azkaban was less unpleasant without the Dementors was sadly mistaken. The cells were still small. It was still damp. Though, some strange (but good) things had been happening lately, and Pansy wasn't as uncomfortable as she thought she'd be. On her third day there, the blanket she was wrapped in had shown up. Her good-natured guard Hildebert, an elderly man who refused to believe she was evil, had passed it to her with a smile.

"From a visitor," he'd said.

For the life of her, she couldn't think of who would be visiting her. At first, she'd guessed Rodolphus, but that was impossible. The Ministry had concealment revealers all over the place here, and everyone knew he was a Death Eater. Besides, had he broken in somehow, he would've helped her escape. It couldn't have been her parents. Her father had told her, before she left to live with the Lestranges, that if she got into trouble with this they wouldn't help her out of it. She had been contemplating the possibilities on her third day, when another upgrade to her style of living had taken place. Around lunchtime, Hildebert had shown up with a tray for her. It'd consisted of a sandwich, a pear, a large chocolate cookie and warm cider. Since that day, her food was good. It wasn't the house elf-prepared feast she was accustomed to, but it was better than the salty stew and rock hard biscuits that most prisoners had to eat. The third and strangest occurrence had happened just yesterday. Hildebert had knocked on her door and entered with a book and pen. After giving it to her, he'd said,

"From a visitor." He left with a wink. From this, Pansy had suspected that he was behind the gifts. However, when she thumbed through the book (a journal) she'd found a note that was clearly not from him. He'd had to sign a bunch of papers to be her guard, so she knew his handwriting. This wasn't it. Hildebert's was neat and bold. This handwriting was small and messy.

_I know you're probably lonely in there. Try writing. I haven't been in your situation exactly, but I've been confined by myself before. Writing always helped me through it. If you get finished with this one, just let Hildebert know and he'll tell me. ~ A Friend._

She heard a knock at the cell door and stood. Three Ministry officials marched in, followed by Hildebert. Her guard handed her a breakfast tray (oatmeal, a peach and cider).

"These men have some questions for you," he said.

"What do you want?" Pansy asked them.

"You were captured in the company of Death Eaters," the first one said. "We know you are not a Death Eater yourself, but we think you may have information. Should you give us anything helpful, you will be released."

"I don't know anything," Pansy said. "I wasn't, you know, a part of the group. They didn't tell me anything important."

"But you were out with them," the second one said.

"Yeah, they were trying to see if I was good enough to join. Obviously, I wasn't," Pansy indicated the cell around her.

"What was your mission that day?"

"We were supposed to be collecting ingredients from the apothecary in Knockturn Alley."

"For?"

"No idea. I don't even remember quite what we were getting. I know we were picking up salamander scales and…er…powdered Sphinx tooth. I don't remember anything else."

"Where were you residing? Is it a Death Eater hub?"

"Yes, it was. But I don't know where it was."

"Liar," the third one snapped.

Pansy glared at him. "I've answered you truthfully for the rest of the questions. What makes you think I'd lie now?"

"You don't want us to go round up your friends."

Pansy snorted at this, and pulled the blanket tighter around her. "They're not my friends. Here's what I know. We were in a castle. It belongs to the Lestranges. I have no idea where it is, because they put me in an enchanted sleep when they brought me there." She sipped her cider and looked up at the Ministry wizards. "I don't know what else to say."

"It's fine," the first wizard said. "We'll let you enjoy your breakfast in peace." He led the way out of the small room.

Once everyone was gone and she'd finished her breakfast, Pansy sat under the window to write. She'd taken to writing letters to her parents, quite intent on sending the book to them once it was filled. She wanted them to know her suffering, to hear about each scar Bellatrix had inflicted. She was finishing page eleven of her latest angsty tirade when there was another knock at the door. She looked at the sun's spot on the floor, and realized it was lunch time. She shoved the journal under her blanket as the door opened. Instead of being greeted by Hildebert, however, a witch entered with her lunch.

"Wotcher!" the witch said cheerfully. "I brought you lunch."

"Er…who are you?" Pansy asked, taking the tray. It was some kind of chicken casserole and pumpkin juice.

"Oh, right, I suppose you wouldn't know. For now you're going to have to call me 'Rainbow', but I'll tell you my real name before long."

"Rainbow? They couldn't find a more adult nickname for you? I think I had a friend named Rainbow in the second grade…" Pansy smirked.

"Well, there's a reason for it," Rainbow said with a shrug. "I need to talk to you, alright? Just eat your lunch and listen."

Pansy wasn't sure whether or not she liked being treated like a six year old, but she did as she was told.

"I'm to move you to a secret location and be your guard there for…an indefinite amount of time. You'll get a new name as well!" Rainbow said. "Anyway, we'll be moving as soon as you finish your lunch. I'll disguise you, and we'll use Side-Along Apparation to move. Understand?"

"The plan, yes. Why, no," Pansy answered, picking at her lunch. "How come they're moving me? I'm a criminal."

"Well, technically you aren't. You were caught in the company of criminals. In the grand scheme of things, those are pretty close, but still not the same. If I remember your trial correctly—"

"Trial? I didn't have a trial!"

"You did, you just weren't there," Rainbow continued pleasantly. "If I remember correctly, the consensus was that you aren't evil or a criminal, and therefore can't be kept here. You have given us a bit of information, however unimportant, and that is generally frowned upon in Death Eater circles. Something wrong?"

Pansy had flinched at the term Death Eater. Some of the reflecting time spent in this cell had allowed her to think about how close she'd come to taking that title. She couldn't stand to think about them anymore. "Nothing, just had a chill."

"I have to go talk with someone for a moment. Hildebert will bring you to the office when it's time."

Pansy waited until she left to wolf down the rest of her lunch. When she'd chugged her pumpkin juice, she folded her blanket and stuck the journal inside of it.

A minute or two later, Hildebert came through the door. "Are you ready?" he asked.

"Sure."

He led her down the long hallway to the elevator. It took them down a few levels into a lobby-type area. Rainbow was waiting there with the three wizards that had questioned her. The one who'd called her a liar glared at them. When she and Hildebert reached the small group, the first Ministry wizard said, "Best behavior, understand?"

She shrugged and looked at Rainbow. The older witch looked vaguely familiar, but Pansy couldn't quite pinpoint what it was. With a smile, Rainbow tapped Pansy on the head with her wand. She felt an odd cooling sensation run down her body and guessed that she'd been disguised.

"Ready?" Rainbow asked.

"I guess," Pansy said, taking her arm. She saw her new guard nod at the wizards once before the Apparated sensation took hold. When she opened her eyes again, they were standing in a hallway. The door Rainbow opened had the number eight on it. She walked into the small apartment and looked around. It was decorated in art deco style and looked rather small.

"Your room is there," Rainbow said, pointing to the first door off the kitchen. "No sneaking out. You're here for your own protection. Besides, I'll know if you try and you don't have a wand."

"I'm not going anywhere," Pansy said, omitting the fact that she had nowhere to go.

"Good!" Rainbow said. "Go put your things away. I'll make some tea and we can talk. Oh, by the way, the whole 'Rainbow' thing was just to get us out of Ministry hands. My name is Tonks."

**_LbN: Hope you liked it!!! Send reviews, mmmkay?_**


	6. Hope

**_LbN: And finally, we get to Tonks! The story's pace is going to pick up from here, I promise. I know we started a little slow :)..._**

Pansy pushed the door to her room open. A black iron bed with a huge mattress and red comforter stood on the far side of the room. A dresser and desk was opposite it. She tossed her few things on the bed and walked into the kitchen again. Her guard had changed clothes, and was now wearing a black tank top and black cotton capri pants, with teal hair. Pansy stood in the doorway, confused. Hadn't she had black hair a minute ago? In any case, she was sure the older witch was showing off her body. No one walked around dressed like that. "Tonks, was it?" she asked.

"That's right," Tonks said, nodding. "I expect you're needing answers."

"That would be lovely." Unable to restrain the impulse, she asked, "Are you pureblood?"

Tonks smiled. She poured two cups of tea and brought them to the table. Motioning for Pansy to join her, she said, "Your old guardian, Bellatrix? She's my aunt."

"Pull the other one. Draco doesn't have an older sister!"

"No, I'm Andromeda's girl."

Pansy thought back; she'd heard the name before. After a second, it came to her. Bellatrix had mentioned her, briefly, during one of their lessons—Andromeda was the one that had defected. "Oh! So you're not, then."

"No, I'm not pureblood. But I am related to your idol."

"She's not my idol," Pansy mumbled.

"Then my blood status shouldn't matter. Now, about the past few weeks. You have questions for me."

"What's with this?" Pansy waved a hand, indicating the apartment. "And why couldn't you say your real name around the Ministry people?"

"Because the Ministry knows I work for the Order of the Phoenix. We're trying to stop You-Know-Who from recruiting children. I've been tailing you for the past few weeks, trying to get you away from Bellatrix. You didn't go out as much as I'd hoped, but I almost managed to get to you when you visited Gringotts. I think you saw me when I tripped in the alley way."

Pansy remembered the flash of purple she'd seen and nodded. "You were wearing purple robes, right?"

"Purple hair, actually."

"Speaking of, didn't you have black hair a moment ago?"

Tonks scrunched her nose and turned her hair pink, then blonde, then back to teal. "I'm a metamorphmagus."

"Oh." Pansy was quiet for a moment. Another question came to her suddenly. "Do you know who was sending me things? Was it your Order lot?"

"It was me," Tonks explained. "I've been in charge of the 'No More Kids for Voldy' campaign, and I took a special interest in you."

"Why?"

"My mum told me what it's like to grow up in a pureblood house. Even if your parents don't openly support the Dark side, there are things expected of you—standards to uphold, if you will." She paused for a drink as Pansy nodded. "You've been brainwashed into this lifestyle, but, as most kids would, you got disillusioned quickly. I wanted to make sure you came out of this mess okay. That's why a group of us disguised ourselves and went to your trial. We were able to persuade the rest that you were a victim of the circumstances you were born into. That way, when I suggested a food upgrade, they were more open to the idea. So long as it wasn't publicized. Hildebert is a good man. He wasn't opposed to my sending you things to make your stay easier. Once you were in there, it was a lot easier to get to you. We just had to do some quick magic to make them think I was supposed to be taking you with me."

"I still don't get why I was such a priority. I mean, I chose to go with them. You could've just left me to my fate."

"It was suggested, don't get me wrong," Tonks conceded with a smirk. "But I couldn't let them do it. I know you're not evil. You have shades of evil, yes, but you're not a Death Eater. I think you know that too."

Pansy looked down at her untouched tea. She took a sip, just to avoid answering. When she looked up, Tonks was still looking at her. "So…what do I do now?"

"You relax. This place is guarded like none other. I'm the Secret Keeper, and there're other enchantments on it as well. We do have some rules that I'll need your cooperation in, though. First, you're not to go anywhere without me. You'll be disguised and we'll have different names to use. Second, no sneaking out. I'll probably catch you before you get anywhere, since you don't have a wand, but still. I don't want Bellatrix to snatch you back. Or Rodolphus, as would probably be the case."

"So, am I not going back to Hogwarts?" Pansy asked.

"We'll see. We erased everything that you told the Ministry wizards, and if on the off chance the Death Eaters do find out, you were under Veritaserum anyway. In any case, we have no idea how much danger you'll be in if we let you go back to school. If we do let you go, we have to know there's a way for us to get to you…It's a lot to think about, but we'll get it sorted. If you don't go back, I'll teach you here."

"You'll teach me?"

"I happen to be an excellent tutor," Tonks said with a smug grin. "Anyway, back to the rules. The last thing, and this is important, if we go out you have to stay within arm's reach of me. I know that's a bummer, but if something happens we have to be able to do Side Along Apparition. Got all that?"

"Yeah. Will I be allowed a wand?"

"I have your wand. It was confiscated when you were captured, but one of the Order members got it back for me. You'll get it back if you go back to Hogwarts."

"What about now?" Pansy whined.

"Now, I can't trust you enough to give it to you. How do I know that you don't have some cock-a-mammy scheme to go back to the Death Eaters? Possibly thinking they'll be lenient on you for being captured."

Pansy gaped at Tonks. That had been exactly what she was thinking.

"I was an Auror for a reason," Tonks said. "I'm going to protect you, even if that means I have to protect you from yourself. If you went back, they might—_might—_ be lenient. But mostly they're going to be pissed that you got yourself caught. Especially Bellatrix. You're her protégé, that reflects on her training. And even if you somehow escaped her wrath, you'd still have to take the Mark. And, as I said before, you are not a Death Eater. You'll believe that before long."

"Thank you," Pansy whispered.

"What was that?"

"Thank you. I'm…I'm glad you got me out of Azkaban. Look, I don't like you yet—"

"I didn't expect you too." Tonks grinned and leaned back in the chair.

Now Pansy was sure she was showing off. "But I'm going to try. You're more tolerable than most mud—"

"Don't finish that word," Tonks said.

Up until now, Pansy had thought Tonks was just a fun loving do-gooder from Dumbledore's crew. She now had a feeling that this woman was not one to screw with. The older witch didn't sound mad, but she had the tone of voice that told she wasn't dicking around. In other words, Tonks had the "Mother Tone" perfected. Pansy scowled. "Fine. This is going to be hard…."

"I never said it was going to be easy. You've hardly been here fifteen minutes and you're already testing my patience."

"I'm testing _your_ patience?" Pansy sputtered. She knew Tonks was just teasing her, but she wasn't in the mood. She took another sip of her now cold tea. "So what do I have to call you when we go out?"

"I thought we'd pick each other's names," Tonks said. "A bonding experience, right?"

Pansy restrained the urge to roll her eyes, but with difficulty. "Fine. You're…Francesca." Pansy decided, grinning at Tonks.

"You better be planning on calling me Frankie," Tonks said, glaring at her. "Don't get me wrong, it's a few steps up from 'Nymphadora', but still way too long. Okay, let me think of one for you."

"Be gentle," Pansy said.

"Says the girl who just named me Francesca. Alright, you're Colby."

"Like the cheese????"

"I had a cat named Colby when I was at Hogwarts. You remind me of her." Tonks shrugged.

This time, Pansy really did roll her eyes. "Do you have anything to eat?" she asked. "My lunch was kind of gross, so I didn't finish it."

"There's all kinds of stuff," Tonks nodded toward the refrigerator. "I didn't know what you liked, so I grabbed everything."

"What is this thing?" Pansy asked, picking up one of the appliances on the counter.

"It's a toaster, kiddo," Tonks said.

"Enough with the 'kiddo' and 'child' stuff," Pansy grumbled. She'd made a mental note to tell Tonks not to start that. "I'm seventeen already."

"You're younger than me." Tonks shrugged.

A silver mist floated down and took the shape of a lynx. "Tonks," it said. "Report to headquarters for a meeting. New Death Eater sightings."

"I've got to run. Eat something light and I'll make dinner when I get back."

"Sure," Pansy said.

"It's going to be alright," Tonks told her, ruffling her hair.

Pansy watched as she walked out the door. With a sigh, she pulled the refrigerator open and looked for a snack. Annoy Pansy though she did, this Tonks woman seemed to be genuinely interested in her safety, which was a welcome change. She'd try to be good, she decided. For the first time in months, Pansy thought there was some hope left for her after all.

**_LbN: You like? You hate? Don't care? Send reviews!!!_**


	7. Breaking the Rules

**_LbN: Hey guys! This is going to be the last update for about two weeks :(. I'm in the middle of finals, so I won't be able to write. I'll make up for it over break, promise! _**

_July 22__nd__,_

_I've been here three weeks now. Not sure about this Tonks woman. We have sort of a love-hate relationship right now. She's nice enough, but she doesn't put up with my temporary lapses into old pureblood ways. I think I've been almost completely broken of using the term "mudblood." She has really cute temper tantrums when I argue with her on stuff like that. She can be infuriating, though. In these past three weeks, I've been allowed out four times. Once was only to go with her to collect the post. She starts going on about security and how this is for my safety. And she just smiles when I get frustrated. She told me we'd be going somewhere tomorrow, but she didn't tell me where. She's been acting kind of strange for a few days. I think something's going on with the Order that's stressing her out. I don't like it. She gets quiet when she's stressed. I wish she…_

Pansy was about to finish the sentence off with _"…could just stay with me and forget about that stupid Order stuff,"_ when Tonks peeked into her room.

"Knock knock!" the metamorph said. "Hey, our little shopping trip can't wait. We need to go to Diagon Alley today."

"Diagon Alley?" Pansy asked. "I thought we had to stick around here. Aren't we just getting food?"

"Actually, no. We'll be getting your school things as well. We've found out that the Carrows are the only Death Eaters that will be in Hogwarts. We think it's safe enough for you to go back."

"Great!" Pansy yelped. "Can we go now?"

"If you're ready," Tonks said, nodding.

A minute later, Pansy was looking at herself in the mirror. She didn't quite believe it was her. Tonks always had far too much fun disguising the two of them. Right now, Pansy had brown wavy hair that was about two inches past her shoulders. Tonks'd made her change outfits about seven times, until she'd found one that "no pureblood would be caught dead wearing." She'd also put some kind of weird Glamour on her to change her nose shape and eye color. After Tonks had disguised herself as well, the two of them Apparated to Diagon Alley. Pansy took Tonks' hand as they walked. It made her feel like a two year old, but she was paranoid being in a place of Death Eater traffic and Tonks didn't seem to mind. "Ton—Frankie," Pansy corrected herself. "Have there been, you know, a lot of sightings here?" Pansy kept her voice low as she spoke.

"Not this week, but in the past yes. Stick close, okay?"

They made their way through the shops. Flourish and Blotts to get new books, the apothecary for potions ingredients. They were walking into the parchment store when Pansy stopped, dropping Tonks' hand.

"What is it?" Tonks asked.

"Nothing," Pansy said. "I just thought I saw…never mind." As they made their way into the shop, Pansy fell back against the crowd. It wasn't as bad as the back-to-school rush that would descend upon the place in a few weeks, but big enough for Pansy to get lost in. As she walked back onto the street, she heard Tonks' panicked voice.

"Colby! Where are you?"

Making a run for it, Pansy sprinted up the marble stairs and into the bank. She felt a cold breeze past her neck and knew something was wrong. Reaching up, she took hold of her hair and looked at it. It was black again; the disguise had been lifted. She glanced around at the goblins, who were eyeing her suspiciously. Spotting the woman she'd followed in, she hurried over to her. "Mum!" she said, smiling.

The older witch looked down at her, but did not speak. When Pansy saw she was attracting a crowd of curious goblins, she whispered, "Mum, what's wrong? It's me."

"I don't associate with criminals," Maxine Parkinson said.

"I'm not a criminal!" Pansy protested, a little louder than she'd meant to.

"You're causing a scene. Please leave me in peace."

Pansy shot her mother a hurt, but defiant look and stayed put. She was planning on staying, but a goblin put a hand on her elbow and said, "You must leave miss."

Pansy nodded at him. As she left the bank, she tried desperately not to cry. She got to the bottom of the steps and two arms shot out and pulled her into the alley. But instead of Tonks, she was pulled into a crushing hug by Rodolphus.

"Pansy! We didn't know what had happened to you! We broke in to Azkaban last week, but you weren't there. We feared the worst. Where have you been this whole time? Wait, no, we shouldn't talk here. We'll go back to the house now, and you can tell us everything. Do you have your wand? No," he continued before she could answer. "I don't suppose you would. I expect they broke it. Let's—"

A bright purple light exploded in the alley, and Pansy was thrown to the ground. She felt a hand close around her arm, and a squeezing sensation as whoever had grabbed her Apparated them away. When the feeling stopped and her eyes adjusted to the light, she saw they were back in the apartment complex. She felt Tonks push her into the apartment and spun to face the older woman. She retreated a few steps when she got a good look at the metamorphmagus.

Tonks' basic appearance was back to normal, but she was flushed and her hair was bright red. She stared at Pansy for a moment before pinching the bridge of her nose. Pansy suspected she was counting to ten. "What _**the fucking hell**_ were you playing at?" Tonks asked in a whisper.

Pansy wasn't sure, but she thought she'd have liked it better if Tonks had screamed at her. "I…I'm sorry. I just," Pansy began. She was really having a hard time not crying now.

Tonks seemed to notice this and calm down a bit. She took Pansy gently by the arm and steered her to the couch. "What happened? Why did you leave?"

"I saw my mum," Pansy said, choking up at last. Tonks pulled her close and held her as she explained through tears. "I saw her go into the bank and I just wanted to say hi. To tell her I was okay. She didn't…she barely even looked at me! And then she called me a criminal."

"I'm sorry, sweetie. Don't ever do that again, though! When I got outside of the shop, I couldn't see you. So I just waited there for a while, hoping you'd come back. I saw you come out of the bank and was on my way to grab you, but Rodolphus got there first. He didn't happen to tell you what he's doing out in the open, did he?"

"No, I was too shocked to ask." Pansy pulled away from Tonks a little to wipe her eyes.

"It's a good thing he was too, or else he wouldn't have stopped for a chat. That was the only thing that let me get to you in time. Well, at least one good thing came of that little fiasco."

"What?"

"We know there's some kind of concealment revealing charm on the doors of Gringotts. Your Glamour stopped working."

The two witches were quite for a moment. Finally Pansy, still leaning on Tonks, asked, "Will I still be able to go to Hogwarts?"

Tonks looked at her for a minute before answering. "That depends on one thing."

"What's that?"

"If I hadn't gotten to you, would you have gone with Rodolphus? Or would you have tried to get away?"

"I…I was really surprised, but I guess I would have tried to get away. Or at least stall."

"That's good." Tonks paused again, glancing down at Pansy. "Do you want to be a Death Eater?" she asked after a moment.

"No."

"Really?"

"No. I used to, when I was listening to Draco brag about it. But once I started training, once I really knew what I had to do, I didn't want that anymore. I'm glad you saved me. I wasn't trying to run off, I swear! I just wanted to see my mum."

"Consider yourself on probation. Do anything like that again, and you're not going anywhere."

Pansy nodded and sat up. She wandered into the kitchen and cursed herself for pulling that stunt before they'd gotten groceries.

"I'll go get something," Tonks said.

"Can I come too? We're just going to the market down the street, and I won't run off this time!"

"Fine," Tonks said after a moment. "You keep hold of my hand until we're back here, understand? Let's go."

**_LbN: Hope you liked the chapter! Send reviews, please!_**


	8. Evil Angel

**_LbN: OMG WHAT??? Could it be? An update? That's right, I've had a burst of inspiration! Don't get your hopes up too high, this one's still on the back burner. But you will see updates more often. For real this time ;)._**

Pansy closed her journal and put it on the nightstand. It was full, so she'd have to ask for another one. She walked down the hall to find Tonks in the living room. She was watching some sort of box with people in it. "What is that?" Pansy asked, pointing to the living room's new edition.

"This, my evil angel, is called a television set. It's a Muggle invention, and a handy one for those of us who get bored around the house."

"A television set?"

"You watch programs on it. Come on, watch with me."

Pansy hesitated for a moment before sitting down next to Tonks. Without thinking, she leaned against the older witch, a habit from her Junior Death Eater days. Oddly enough, everyone expected Bellatrix to show affection for her adopted daughter, so Pansy had been allowed to lean against her during less formal events. The main difference between snuggling with Bellatrix, and snuggling with Tonks, was that Tonks actually hugged back. The witch never really asked why Pansy would randomly latch onto her, but she went with it.

Pansy looked at the screen again. As far as she could tell, the program was just a drawing of a sponge chasing jellyfish. The sponge's laugh was really annoying. "Tonks?"

"Yes?"

"Why?" Pansy asked, smirking.

"Sometimes I like to watch mindless stuff to unwind."

"Kay. By the way, how long are you going to call me your evil angel?"

"Until it _really _starts to annoy you," Tonks said, grinning down at her.

Pansy snorted. The nickname was in reference to the nightmares Pansy had been experiencing. On more than one occasion, Tonks'd had to shake her awake. When she'd come to, all of the fear, guilt and sadness Pansy usually kept hidden, came out. The last time this had happened was when Pansy had gotten her current nickname....

"_Let go of me!" Pansy gasped through sobs._

_Tonks held onto her. "No," she said. "Just breathe, you're okay."_

"_You should've left me in Azkaban! I'm evil, why did you bother? Why do you bother?"_

"_You're not evil."_

"_I am."_

"_You're not. You've been an angel here," Tonks said, smiling at her. "You're runaway stunt notwithstanding."_

"_I'm evil," Pansy whispered._

"_I'll compromise with you," Tonks said, shifting them gently so Pansy could lean back against her. "Evil angel."_

"_What does that mean?" Pansy chuckled._

"_It means you're good, but not perfect. You have traits, and moments, where the bad comes through. But you're good, I know it."_

Pansy smiled, remembering that night. Tonks, for whatever reason, had stayed there with her. The next morning she'd hugged Pansy, but hadn't mentioned the event. In fact, the only reminder that it had occurred was the fact that she still called Pansy that every now and then. "Can we go shopping?"

"No," Tonks said sadly. "There's been way too much Death Eater activity in those areas. What do you need? I'll get it for you."

"A new journal. I filled up the one you gave me."

Tonks nodded. "Sure. I'll pick one up after the meeting tomorrow."

* * *

Pansy carefully scooped the mashed potatoes into a bowl and put them on the counter. She looked over at her chicken casserole, hoping it tasted okay. Cooking was the only Muggle thing she'd agreed to learn, and that was only because Tonks had put her foot down. The metamorph had told Pansy she could either learn to cook or learn to clean, and Pansy had opted for the one that allowed her to be clean and not sweaty. She heard the door open, and a second later Tonks was in the kitchen.

"Wotcher," she said.

"Hi Tonks. I made dinner!" Pansy tried not to sound too pleased with herself, just in case the meal was a bust.

Tonks smiled. "Wonderful, I'm starving."

Once they'd both gotten food and drinks, they sat at the table. Tonks inhaled about half of her food before speaking again. "There's been a…er…change of plans."

"What's that?"

"You won't be going back to Hogwarts."

"What? But…you promised!"

"I promised under the condition that you would be safe. And you won't be. Not now."

"What's happened?"

"Snape's been made headmaster."

Pansy snorted. "And? You're telling me you were okay with sending me back with both of the Carrows as teachers, but you've gone all frightened at Snape?"

"The Carrows are thugs, Snape is smart. And, as Headmaster, he'd have the power to send you right into Bellatrix's hands if she asked."

Pansy was quiet. She picked at her food, fuming. If she ever saw Snape again, she was going to kick him in the shins.

"It won't be so bad," Tonks promised. "I've collected everything you need for home tutoring. And, just think, you won't have to get up early for class!"

"I suppose," Pansy said. Really, Tonks was right. It couldn't be that horrible, and there was the added bonus of not having to see Amycus again. "Did you pick up another journal for me?"

"I did. It's in the bag on top of your school things."

"Do I still get to have my wand back?"

"Only for school work."

"Oh, come on!" Pansy whinged.

"Just on orders," Tonks said, raising her hands. "I may trust you, but the rest of the Order doesn't."

"So, does this mean you're going to stay here from now on?"

Tonks nodded. "I'll be here unless something goes wrong and they need reinforcements."

They finished their dinner in silence. Pansy went into the living room and spotted three shopping sacks on the floor. A book with a dark leather cover was poking out of the top of the closest bag. "Thank you," she said. She knew, without looking, that Tonks had followed her.

"You're welcome," the ex-Auror said. "Want to watch TV with me?"

Pansy looked from her to her new book. "I'm tired. I think I'm going to call it a night."

"Right you are. Good night."

"Night, Tonks." Pansy walked back to her room and shut the door. With a smile, she grabbed her quill and ink and sat down to write.

_**LbN: Hope you liked it! Send reviews!**_


	9. Cold

**Evil Angel**

Pansy counted the pages she'd filled in the two days since she'd gotten the journal. Since there were no more torture sessions to recount, it was filling up slower than the last one. She glanced at her watch. 11:30, and Tonks still wasn't home. She rubbed the scar on her arm, a nervous habit she'd developed in the past few months. With one last glance at her bedroom door, she snuggled into the blankets and closed her eyes.

* * *

"Pansy!" Tonks yelled.

Pansy jolted awake, panting. She was shivering and drenched in sweat. "I…I can't… breathe…"

"Sit up, you're okay. Deep breaths."

Pansy continued to go through the breathing exercise. She leaned back against Tonks as her breathing slowed again. "I'm… I'm sorry. I—" Pansy shivered again.

"Calm down. You're all right." Tonks held her tightly and asked, "You ever gonna tell me what these nightmares are about?"

Pansy rubbed her arm again. When she took her hand away, Tonks gasped.

"How long have you had that?"

"Ever since before Azkaban. It's fine. I'm fine." Pansy didn't move from Tonks' arms. Her breathing was almost normal again, but she was still shaking.

"You're not," Tonks said, hugging her. "Please talk to me. I know something's bothering you. Please talk to me." She ran her finger along the scar, which went from Pansy's wrist to her elbow. "How'd you get this?"

"Bellatrix. I don't remember what happened. I fainted during training and when I woke up, Rodolphus was wrapping my arm."

"Are your nightmares going away at all?"

"A little. This is the first one I've had in a while."

"That's good! Do you think you can get back to sleep?"

"I think so," Pansy said. She jumped when she felt the older witch move. "Don't leave!" she said. "Please, just…stay."

"Okay," Tonks said. She slid into bed next to Pansy and ruffled the Slytherin's hair. "Good night."

Pansy said nothing, but hugged Tonks and closed her eyes again.

* * *

The next morning, as per usual, Tonks said nothing about Pansy's spaz attack. When Pansy emerged from her room, Tonks had made breakfast and was reading the Daily Prophet.

"Hey," Pansy said.

"Wotcher."

"Something's…different," Pansy said, looking around. "Where'd the T.V. go? And…there's furniture missing…"

"We're moving. I've been sending stuff to our new place this morning."

"Moving? Why, what happened?"

"A few things. First, Harry and friends broke into the Ministry, which sent things into a shit storm. That led to the second thing, more Death Eater patrols in magical areas. Which led to three, the fact that Rodolphus and another Death Eater spotted you yesterday. They know we're here. They'll probably try to get in again in the next hour or so."

"Wait, again?" Pansy asked. "When did they…how did you…?"

"They saw you when I made the mistake of taking you to the store with me in the morning. Thank God, Kingsley was tailing them and notified me. I spent the afternoon just outside the apartment strengthening the protective spells on the place, but when I left that evening it was because they were trying to get in."

"So you just went out to face them???" Pansy shouted, impressed and pissed off all at once.

"I disguised myself and hid. Kingsley and I threw up shields every time they broke threw one. They finally gave up around two in the morning, that's when I came back and found you." She folded the paper and waved her wand at the couch. It disappeared, and she went on vanishing things.

"When do we leave?" Pansy asked.

"As soon as I moved the stuff in your room."

Pansy turned to leave, but stopped. Something was wrong. "Tonks?"

"Shhhh!" Tonks said. She'd obviously noticed it too. She threw a shield at the door and vanished a lamp. Grabbing Pansy by the arm, she rushed into the younger witch's room and threw up another shield. While she vanished things she said, "It's going to take them about ten minutes to break through all the shields on the apartment. Do you have everything?"

All Pansy had to take were her journals. She nodded as she put them into a bag. Immediately after taking Tonks' arm, she felt herself Disapparate. The first thing she registered when they landed was that they were somewhere cold. Opening her eyes, she saw why. "Tonks?" she whispered.

The room, filled with all their things, was metal and there was a slight breeze coming in from the open window. It looked like a jail.

Pansy went to the window and looked out. They were on a cliff overlooking a lake. "Tonks?"

"Wotcher," Tonks said behind her.

Pansy turned as she heard something cracking. Tonks had lit a flare and was putting it in a corner. "Where are we?" Pansy asked, teeth chattering.

"It's one of the Order's temporary houses. Basically, it's just a bunch of metal sheds put together, but it serves. Sorry it's so cold," she said, waving her wand. The furniture flew into place. "The flare'll warm this place up in no time. That'll be our light too. It's low, so no one should be able to spot it. I'll be putting up blackout curtains just in case." She sat down on the couch and pulled a blanket up to her chin.

"How long do we have to stay here?" Pansy asked.

"Not sure. Everything's…a little crazy right now. It's going to be crazy for a while, I think."

Pansy sat next to her, and Tonks unfolded the blanket a little. Pansy slid over next to her.

"There's one other thing," Tonks said. "I'm going to have to teach you…defensive procedures. Real, Auror quality defense against the Dark Arts. If I have to…if something happens…you need to be ready."

Pansy flinched. The thought of starting any kind of training was horrifying.

"This won't be like before, with Bel…with my aunt. It's going to be hard, but I'm not going to hurt you."

Pansy nodded, but stayed silent. "Are there new rules for this place?" she asked after a few minutes.

"If I'm not home by dark, you have to stay in the bedroom. I'll teach you how to pick up on the alarm system, but you've already got it basically. That's what you felt before we left. If anything happens, you have to Apparate to the place that's in your journal."

Pansy looked oddly at her.

"I wrote it down this morning."

"Oh. Alright."

"We'll be okay, Pansy."

Somehow, Pansy didn't believe her.

_**LbN: Send reviews!!!**_


	10. Put Me To Sleep

**Evil Angel**

Pansy bent over, panting. She barely registered Tonks moving her to sit in one of the chairs on the side of the room.

"Well done," Tonks said, kneeling beside her. "That's loads better than last time." She waved her wand and stilled the moving furniture. "Are you alright?"

"Fine," Pansy said. She was still breathing heavily, but the panic had subsided. Ever since she'd been training with Tonks, Pansy had been suffering moderate panic attacks. As long as she kept her footing, and her head, she was fine. However, the moment she made a misstep, she'd have flashbacks of her second and last Death Eater mission (or of her previous training with Bellatrix) and freeze.

"At least they're going away more quickly now."

"Yeah…" Pansy said, turning away from Tonks's gaze.

"Let's make dinner."

"I'm fine. I can keep going." Pansy hated having to stop because of her little episodes. She hated looking fragile.

"Well what if I'm tired?" Tonks asked, smiling.

"You're not. You're just saying that."

"Fine," Tonks said. "You caught me. But we should stop now, nonetheless. You don't have to push yourself to breaking to impress me." With that, she stood and walked into another part of their makeshift house.

Pansy could hear her rummaging around in their small kitchen. She sat there for another moment, making sure her breathing was completely under control, before following after Tonks.

* * *

Pansy shot up in bed with a gasp. Automatically, she looked to her left at Tonks. The other witch's presence was calming, even if she was asleep. Pansy took a few deep breaths and swung her legs over the edge of their queen sized bed. She grabbed one of the flairs and, taking it into the living room, cracked it. A few purple sparks flew from it, and she tossed it into the fireplace. Curling up in the chair, she picked up her book to read.

"Another nightmare?"

Pansy's head snapped up. Tonks was standing in the doorway. "I'm fine. Go back to bed."

Tonks stood there for a second. "I have an idea. Come in here." She led Pansy back into the bedroom. "Lie down on your back. I'm going to teach you Linked Meditation."

"What?" Pansy asked, complying anyway.

"Some of the Aurors are…er…not immediately ready for the stresses of training. Meditation helps. Take my hand."

Pansy did, and closed her eyes. She felt Tonks tap their entwined hands once with her wand. Almost immediately, Pansy felt herself relax. Her breathing slowed, and she felt pleasantly drowsy. Her eyes fluttered open and she tried to focus on Tonks. It was like the older witch was breathing for her. She wasn't sure she liked that…

"I'm not going to hurt you," Tonks told her quietly. "You don't have to fight it."

Reassured, Pansy closed her eyes again.

"I can keep you like this for a while, or we can sleep."

"Sleep." Pansy felt Tonks lie down next to her. Within a few minutes, she was asleep.

* * *

_**Two Weeks Later**_

Pansy tossed a few bits of ham into the pan. They'd been running desperately low on food, so she was making a "Whatever's In The Ice Box" fry up. So far there were scrambled eggs, ham, potatoes, and half of a bell pepper. Hopefully Tonks was bringing home something more substantial, because there was only enough for one of them. As she turned the stove off, Pansy minutely heard and felt the alarm system go off, but she knew it was Tonks from the wolf Patronus that landed by her side a second later.

"I brought friends!" the wolf said happily.

A second later, the older witch strolled in, arms full of groceries, followed by Kingsley Shaklebolt. "Wotcher, Pansy!"

The Slytherin took a few of the packages from Tonks and asked, "How did you get all this?" So far, their meals had consisted of canned meat, canned vegetables, canned fruit, and such dairy products that could be pinched from the nearby village without detection. There'd been no bread for weeks. Now, the sight of fresh fruits and veggies was making Pansy desperately hungry.

"I met Kingsley in the market," Tonks said. "He'd come to give me an Order report, and since we were both in disguise, I talked him into shopping."

"I can't stay long," Kingsley said. "I just came in to help Tonks." He set his few bags on the table and nodded to them both. "It may be a while before I can get in touch," he said.

"I know," Tonks told him. "Stay safe."

He tipped his hat to them and exited.

"What's going on?"

"Nothing dire. Just a few more…er…mishaps than we've been seeing."

The night passed quietly, and when they climbed into bed, Pansy moved her hand away from Tonks's.

"Again?" Tonks asked with a smile. "That's the fourth night in a row you haven't need to meditate."

"I'm getting better," Pansy mumbled, blushing.

The next day, Pansy woke up and smiled. She'd slept through the night for the first time in a year.

"Pansy? You awake?"

"Yeah."

"I have to go," Tonks said.

Opening her eyes, Pansy saw Tonks dressing in a hurry. The older witch fell over, but righted herself quickly.

"I've had a message from Remus," Tonks began. "I'll be gone today, and I don't know when I'll be back. Bring your things in here, and keep the curtains drawn today." Tonks hesitated, seemingly on the verge of saying something else, but she simply hugged Pansy and left.

10:30

1:45

6:39

8:00

9:15

Pansy sat on the bed trying to read, but she couldn't focus. She knew there was a chance of Tonks not making it back that night, but she was hoping the metamorphmagus would. Something was wrong, she could feel it. Grabbing her journal and book, she walked to the living area. As she passed from her doorway to the smaller room, she felt it. Someone had tripped the alarm. She registered two things at the same time: Tonks' Patronus hadn't landed next to her, and there were men's voices outside. She sprinted to the kitchen and threw her books into the emergency bag they kept near the table. Grabbing it by the handles, she closed her eyes and Disapparated.

When she opened them again, she was in another of the Order's safe houses. The curtains were drawn, and the place was just as cold as the other had been when they first got there. Pansy walked around, keeping a firm hold on the bag in case this alarm were to go off too. This place was the same as the last one, only not so comfortable. There was no furniture in the living room, because she hadn't sent it here, and the kitchen only had a small stove and ice box, no table. The bedroom had the same queen sized bed, and small bathroom radiating off of it. Pansy set the bag down finally when she went back into the kitchen. Her mind was spinning. What if Tonks had been caught? What if the alarm sounded again? Pansy didn't know where to go next. What if Potter had been killed and the Death Eaters had taken over for good.

She couldn't breathe. Coughing and gasping for breath through tears, she dropped to her knees. She tried remembering the sound of Tonks' voice to calm herself, but she couldn't. She couldn't move, or breathe. She couldn't do anything. Pansy shivered violently, before her world went dark.

_**LbN: Send reviews please! There's a new poll on my profile: Who would win in a duel? Hermione or Ginny?**_


	11. Open Your Wings

**Evil Angel**

Sunlight was filtering in from a small crack in the curtains. Pansy slowly opened her eyes and sat up. She groaned, stretching her sore muscles, and registered two things. The first was that she must have slept through the night after her panic attack. The second was that she spent the night on the floor, which meant Tonks hadn't arrived yet. The older witch would've moved her to the bed. Pansy got to her feet unsteadily and picked up her discarded wand. "Lumos," she said, because despite the fact that it was daytime, the house was still rather dark. The curtains were drawn, but Pansy left them like that. She cracked one of the flares that was in the corner and threw it into the stove. Moving to the small living room, she did the same, hoping the fires would warm the place. In the distance, she could hear waves crashing. The close proximity to the ocean was going to make this house an ice box if she didn't keep the fire going. She conjured chairs and a table, trying to make the space more habitable. Finally, she went back to the kitchen and began unpacking the supply bag. It was back to canned foods mostly, though Tonks had packed a loaf of bread and some fresh apples. Pansy grabbed the spare watch out of the bag and put it on. It was 10:30, but she wasn't hungry. She went back into the living room and sat down to write.

* * *

_**Three Days Later**_

Pansy looked up from her journal to the window. She'd finally gotten over her fear of opening the curtains, but would only do so for this window. She could see the ocean from there. Since the sun was setting, she drew the curtains close and lit another flare. As she walked into the kitchen, she felt the alarm go off and gripped her wand. However, a moment later Tonks' Patronus floated down next to her. Not waiting to hear what it said, Pansy rushed to the door.

Tonks walked in, looking tired, but unhurt. She stopped short when she saw the Slytherin. "Pansy?"

"You're okay," Pansy whispered, hugging her. As far as she'd come in breaking from the pureblood lifestyle, one thing that stuck was her obstinate refusal to break down sobbing. She, therefore, let a few tears fall, but composed herself as quickly as she could.

"I'm fine," Tonks said. "But you're not."

"I'm okay."

"How long has it been since you last slept?"

"Not since the first night I got here. Why?"

Tonks took a pocket mirror out of her robes and held it up for Pansy.

Pansy was shocked to see dark circles under her eyes. She looked like the most decrepit of vampires. "I've been worried."

Without saying another word, Tonks scooped her up and carried her into the bed room. The older witch settled them both into bed, wrapped her arms around Pansy and took her hand, tapping it once with her wand. "Do you want to go straight to sleep?" she asked.

"No, tell me what happened."

"It was my fault, really. I was on my way back and…well, I decided to shop for your birthday present. I was with another member of the Order and I used You-Know-Who's name. There's a taboo on it, so they came right to us. We were in disguise, and it was crowded, so they weren't sure at first, but my friend's disguise wasn't as thorough as mine. They followed us back. I broke the sensor so the alarm would go off and give you time to get away. By the way," she said, shifting to a more comfortable position. "You left your first journal behind. It was in your rucksack. Don't worry," she said, felling Pansy tense as much as was possible under the spell. "I grabbed it. They weren't the best dualers, so I had time to run inside before backup came."

"Why were you gone so long?"

"Had to throw them off the trail. I think by now they know you've defected. A clever witch like you would've found a way to get away if you really wanted to. Especially since they know I take you out places."

Pansy turned over so that she was facing Tonks. Sleepily, she said. "I'm glad your back."

Tonks said nothing, just held her tighter and increased the spell so that they were both soon asleep.

* * *

"Here," Tonks said over breakfast the next day. She tossed a small package to Pansy. "Happy, belated, birthday."

Pansy smiled and unwrapped it. It was a necklace she was sure she'd seen before, and a small vial that looked as if it was made of the same stuff as the pendant.

"It's an amulet. The Order used to use these to communicate. And though I don't see it being a problem, if we're ever separated again, it'll help."

"How does it work?"

"I keep the vial with me, and you wear the necklace. You put a memory in to the vial, just like a Pensive, and it'll link to the amulet. Nifty, huh?"

"Yeah. So I just put a memory in this?"

"It'll work better if it's a memory of me, since I'll be using it."

Pansy touched her wand to her head and extracted the memory of their first meditation session. After putting it into the vial and handing that to Tonks, both the vial and the necklace glowed blue for a moment. "Thank you," Pansy said. And then, before Tonks could say anything, Pansy gave her a peck on the lips. Pansy blushed furiously, but another pureblood trait she'd retained came through at that moment, and she wasn't about to apologize for anything. As calmly as possible, she walked into the living room, leaving the metamorphmagus looking shocked, but happy, in the kitchen.

_**LbN: Hope you liked it! Send reviews, mmmkay?**_


	12. Fly Over Me

**Evil Angel**

The atmosphere in the house had changed, perceptibly, but Pansy didn't care. In fact, she was quite enjoying it. She could tell that Tonks wanted to talk about the kiss, but she was going to make the metamorphmagus bring it up. "What do you want for lunch?" she asked.

"I want to talk to you," Tonks said.

"Well, okay, but I don't think discussions are edible," Pansy said, smirking. "About yesterday?"

"Well, yeah. Look…er…" Tonks didn't seem to know what was supposed to happen next.

"It's very simple," Pansy said, wanting to get this over with. "I kissed you. I like you. I'm pretty sure you like me back." Pansy was aware that this didn't sound as confident as she wanted it to, so she added, "After all, I am pretty irresistible."

Tonks laughed and hugged her. "That you are. What with all that attractive humility you so often exude."

"Ha ha. Anyway…" Pansy said, smiling. "What are we going to do about the food situation? We'll be totally out in the next day or so."

"I'll just have to Apparate somewhere and get groceries. We found out that Death Eaters are putting curfews on major wizarding communities, in case Potter tries to go at night. I'll have to go during the day."

"Why don't you just go to a mostly Muggle community? That way you can still go towards evening."

"I'm not worried about going during the daytime."

"Well, I am."

Pansy looked away from Tonks, willing herself not to blush. They still hadn't really talked about their recent separation, beyond Tonks telling Pansy where to go if it happened again. Neither witch was ready to talk about it, especially since Pansy had finally started sleeping again.

Tonks opened her mouth to say something, but a Patronus floated into the cabin at that moment.

"I've come to talk," came Kingsley's voice from the lynx. "Let me in."

Tonks shot a spell at the door, which glowed red, then purple. The next moment, Kingsley was inside, warming himself by the fire. He dried his rain-soaked cloak while he talked. "A few children have gone missing. We think they're Muggle-borns, but we don't know why they've been targeted. We're putting together a search team, if you can spare a few days."

Pansy looked at the floor, grinding her teeth to keep from protesting. She knew Tonks would have to leave again, but she'd hoped it wouldn't be this soon. Or so dangerous a mission....

Kingsley seemed to pick up on her distress. "She can't stay locked up here for the whole war," he told Pansy.

Pansy looked up, scowling. "I know that."

Tonks was looking from her to Kingsley. "Sit down, Kingsley," she said. "What else is happening? We haven't had news since the last time we moved."

"Nice try, Tonks," Kingsley said, chuckling. "I can tell you don't want the job. There's always Austerlitz."

"What's Austerlitz?" Pansy asked Tonks.

"Fine," Tonks said. "We'll go. What do we need to do?"

"Just pack and go. I'll be back with brooms in a few days. They're expecting you to stay through Christmas and the New Year. I have to go arrange some things for your departure. See you in a few days." He tipped his hat to Pansy, shook Tonks' hand and exited the small home.

"What's going on?" Pansy asked Tonks. "Where are we going?"

"Come sit and I'll explain."

They settled on the couch, and Pansy wrapped a blanket around them. "What's Austerlitz?"

"Lukas and Anke Austerlitz. They live in Germany, which is where we're going. We're going to stay with them through the New Year, as Kingsley said, maybe longer."

"Why?"

"Okay, don't take this the wrong way—I have nothing but faith in Harry—but people seem to forget that there are others who fight the Dark Arts for generations. The Austerlitzes are one of those families. They've all been Dunkel Verfolgers—the German equivalent of Aurors—since the days of Morgan le Fey, maybe longer. Lukas and Anke were the first family abroad to believe You-Know-Who was back, and they've been helping us. Especially since some of their family, their oldest child—Wilhelm— and Anke's sister and brother-in-law, were killed by Death Eaters. We're going to Germany to help with the European resistance. Er…I hope you like children, by the way."

"Why?"

"They have a lot. And their older ones are allowed to visit from school on the weekends. They don't have a true Christmas break like Hogwarts, but they come back for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. Their house is massive, from what others have said."

"How many kids?"

"Christianna is 19, Katja is 17, Maximilian and Gabriele are 16, Marie is 14, Monika is 11, Klaus and Felix are 9, Phillip and Sabrine are 7, and they take care of their nephews and niece, Sebastian- 5, Torsten- 4 and Tanja- 3. That's 7 girls and 6 boys."

"Merlin!"

"The kids that are younger than 10 will be there the whole time. The others have school."

"It's a wonder they get anything done with that lot!"

"The kids, from what I've heard, are darling. They have governesses who tutor them during the day while we'll be working."

"We? Do I get to help now?"

"You may. Anyway, we should start packing."

* * *

_**Three Days Later.**_

Pansy stared out at the lake, holding her broom. As they didn't need to send any furniture ahead, all she and Tonks had were their rucksacks. She shivered as she felt Tonks put a concealment charm on her. Neither witch was talking, just in case. They didn't need to anyway, both knew the plan. They were going to fly to France, and then take the train the rest of the way.

An hour later, Pansy was cold, tired, and inches away from doing a barrel roll and falling off her broom. They'd just made it into France, from what she could make of Tonks' hand signals. Since they had to fly disguised, all she could see were Tonks' hands, and threw the fog she couldn't even see those properly. Finally, they began to descend. Pansy stumbled a few feet when they landed, but Tonks caught her. In a corner of the train station, away from most people's line of vision, Tonks removed the charms. They hopped onto the train, and found two seats.

"Ton—er…" Pansy started. It had been a while since they'd used their code names, and she couldn't remember.

"What's up?" Tonks asked.

"Can I sleep?" It seemed like a stupid question, but after being lectured by both Tonks and Kingsley about not letting her guard down, she felt it needed to be addressed.

"Yeah, don't worry."

Pansy leaned over without another word and closed her eyes.

* * *

Pansy felt Tonks move and woke up. The first thing she noticed was the extremely wooded landscape outside of the window. "Are we here?"

"Yeah," Tonks said, standing and stretching. "Come on."

They waited until most of the people had gotten off the train and moved to a compartment in the back. Drawing the blinds, Tonks took Pansy's hand and said, "Ready?"

Pansy nodded. The next thing she felt was the vacuum sensation of Apparating. When she opened her eyes, they were standing in the shadow of the largest house she had ever seen. It was Malfoy Manor times three. A shadow moved in one of the windows, and a figure came to the door.

"Wait," Tonks said when Pansy made a move to walk forward. "They have to let us in."

The house seemed to shiver, before turning neon purple.

"Come on," Tonks said. She lead Pansy up the driveway and tapped on the side door three times with her wand.

A large, mustached man answered, beaming at them. "Vel-kum!" he said, standing aside so they could enter. "I am Lukas. Tonks?"

"Wotcher," she said, extending her hand.

"And Pansy?"

"Nice to meet you," Pansy said.

"Ve are happy you have k-ome. K-ome, you must meet my family."

_**LbN: We're almost at the end! There's going to be a chapter on their time in Germany, but then there will be a HUGE time cut, because I want to finish this one up. Don't worry, I won't rush it :). But there's only...3, maybe 4 chapters left. Just so you know.**_


	13. Why Can't I Breathe

**Evil Angel**

Winter sunlight streamed in through a crack in the curtains, falling over Pansy's shoulder. As her eyes fluttered open, her gaze fell on the heavy oak door that stood open a crack. Squinting, she saw a little girl in a green dress peeking into the room. An older boy, the one named Klaus, came up and shooed them away.

"_Sabrine!_" Klaus said in a carrying whisper. "Come away!"

The girl smiled and waved at Pansy, before allowing herself to be led away.

Pansy squirmed out of Tonks's arms and walked quietly toward the bathroom. She washed quickly and threw on her clothes. When she reappeared in the bedroom, Tonks was sitting up in bed, inspecting the breakfast tray on the night stand. "Morning," she murmured, taking a sip of tea.

"Good morning." Pansy sat next to her and picked up a piece of toast.

"Lukas is going to give us a tour of the house today. Then we'll just be going over basic things until the meeting tonight."

"Meeting?"

"With some of the other Underground members."

Pansy nodded, taking a bite of her toast.

"Are you alright?" Tonks asked.

"Yeah…just…it's weird being away."

Tonks smiled at her. "I'm going to get in the shower. Wait for me to go downstairs?"

"Sure."

* * *

By the time they got downstairs, the kids were already hard at work studying. Pansy glanced into the room where they were sitting, trying to remember all of them. The oldest set of twins, Klaus and Felix, were easy to recognize. Both had dark brown hair and freckles, with large blue eyes that made both boys seem perpetually startled. The next set, Phillip and Sabrine, were both small for their age, with auburn hair and blue eyes. Sebastian, the youngest in the classroom, was blonde and plump. The two youngest children, Torsten and Tanja, were much the same. They were playing in the sitting room with Lukas and Anke when she and Tonks got there.

"Good morning," Anke said brightly. "Would you like the official tour now?"

"If you're ready," Tonks smiled, taking Pansy's hand.

Pansy knew she wouldn't be able to remember most of the house. It was massive, with too many hallways and staircases to keep track of. But it turned out that she only had to remember how to get to the two nurseries on the ground. That was where the hiding places were.

Two large rooms, connected by a narrow hallway, stood overlooking the back garden. The farthest, and largest, toy chest concealed a staircase to the children's hideout. "The children have a separate hideout than the meeting rooms. Just in case."

They finished the tour and Pansy was pulled into the kitchen by the children. She looked around at the seven small children as they hurled questions at her.

"How old are you?"

"What part of Britain are you from?"

"Did you really go to Hogwarts?"

"Who's the girl with the purple hair?"

"She didn't have purple hair, it was blue!"

"I saw green."

"It was white."

"She's a metamorphmagus," Pansy explained with a chuckle. "She can change her appearance."

"Are you and her sweethearts?" the littlest girl asked, toddling up to Pansy and taking her hand.

"Er…"

"Pansy," Tonks said, coming to her rescue. "There's an Underground meeting. You can talk to the kids later."

Pansy gave the little girl a hug and followed Tonks into a large den. She took a seat next to her and sat back as Lukas started to talk.

"We will have to go on the raid tonight," Lukas said. "Our sources say the papers are still in place, but not for long. Tonks, Pansy, you may come with us if you like, but you must stay with me or Ivan."

"We will," Tonks answered for both of them. "If you want," she added, looking at Pansy.

"Let's go."

* * *

They ran. There were spells and sparks flying, and alarms going off. Pansy pulled Tonks into a small alcove, both of them barely missing a stunning spell. "Careful."

"Thanks," Tonks said, looking around the corner of the small cave building. "Let's go."

They ran through the underground passage, dodging spells. Finally they made it outside and Disapparated.

* * *

They Apparated in the front yard of Lukas's house. Following him inside, Pansy could see him carrying a large file with him. "So we got what we went for, then?"

"Think so," Tonks said.

When they returned to the sitting room, they sat quietly across from Lukas as he went through the folder, smiling. "We have had a stroke of luck," he said. "These are the papers indicating where the kidnapped children are. All will soon be well," he said with a yawn. "We will plan more tomorrow. For now, get some sleep."

Tonks nodded, running a hand through her black hair. She held out a hand to Pansy, helping her up. "Good night, Lukas, Anke."

Pansy nodded at them and walked with Tonks. "Did you hear what the little one asked me this morning?" she asked as they entered their room.

"Tanja? Yeah, I heard her."

"And?"

"Yes?"

"Are we 'sweethearts'?"

"Haven't we been over this?" Tonks asked with a smile.

"Well, sure, but I want to know what to tell the kids."

Tonks kissed her and nodded. "Come on. Let's go to bed."

* * *

The Christmas tree twinkled brightly, even though the big day had passed. With the high Death Eater activity, the oldest children had been allowed to stay at school. The youngest children had barely left Pansy's side the entire time. Which was why she wasn't surprised when Tonks asked her to stay behind during the next raid.

"Anke will be coming with us, so we need someone to stay with the kids. Lukas has moved food into the hideout and set the necessary alarms. All you will have to do is stay in the game room."

"Not in the shelter?" Pansy asked.

"No. They know to stay down there."

Pansy was quiet for second. "All right then. I'll stay."

Tonks kissed her cheek, hair turning pink. "Good. I can't say I'm not happy that you'll be out of danger."

"Yeah, yeah…" Pansy said, blushing as she walked out of their room.

* * *

The night was quiet. Pansy looked up from her journal as she relaxed in the rocking chair. She looked up at the clock and sighed. They had been gone for three hours. She heard a noise behind her and jumped, turning towards it. "Klaus!" she whispered. "What are you doing?"

"Don't worry," Klaus whispered. "I'll stay out of—"

Pansy held up a hand as she heard the alarm sound. "Get down."

The window shattered and Pansy ducked out of the way. She pushed Klaus behind the toy chest. "Stay here," she whispered, but it was too late.

Two people jumped into the nursery through the window. They brandished their wands, and Pansy disarmed one of them. The other sent her flying into a wall.

Pansy's vision swam, but she took a deep breath and sent a curse at the two intruders. She stood and shot a stunning spell that hit one of them. The other was dragging Klaus out of the window. She sprinted after them, shooting spell after spell. She turned and relocked the house, before chasing them into the woods. "Klaus! Yell something!"

"North! We're headed—mmmrrfjjdphhhh!"

Pansy was, luckily, familiar with her directions, and she shot off in that direction. She caught up to them and shot a tripping hex at them. The kidnapper fell, dropping Klause. He got up and shot a curse at Pansy.

She tried to dodge, but it cut her arm. Bleeding, panicked and royally pissed off, Pansy forgot herself and decided to use some Dark magic. She threw a blue spell into the air that lit up the entire forest. After chanting in Latin for a minute, she motioned with her wand as if casting a fishing line. The man was strapped to a nearby tree by some invisible bonds, and she went to Klaus. "We have to get back," she gasped, holding the wound on her arm.

"You're hurt," Klaus said in a shaky voice.

"I'll be fine," Pansy said firmly. "Hurry." She tore the bottom off of her shirt and tied up her arm. "How fast can you run?"

"Fast."

"Let's get going then."

They made it back and Pansy had a bad moment when she saw a large man standing in the window. She drew her wand, but lowered it when she saw Lukas.

"Pansy! Where is Klaus?"

"I have him here," Pansy called. She pushed him gently in front of her. "He's fine."

"What happened?" Lukas said as they entered back through the nursery window.

"It was my fault Papa," Klaus said quietly.

"How so?"

"I…I left the hideout. I wanted to know what was going on. Pansy told me to hide, but I guess those men saw me already. Pansy saved me though."

"I see. Well, we shall talk later. Go to bed now."

Klaus skulked out of the room and Tonks hurried to Pansy's side. Silently, she took off the bloody strip of shirt covering Pansy's wound and healed her.

"Thanks," Pansy said.

"We have the man you stunned in custody, but where is the other man?"

"Oh," Pansy said, remembering. "I'll take you to him. Tonks, no," she said, catching the metamorphmagus by the arm. "I'm fine. I'll show him."

Tonks looked down at her, smiling slightly. "Whatever you did, I'm sure it was to protect Klaus."

Pansy blushed. "I did…I used…"

Tonks pulled her aside and whispered. "Did you use Dark magic?"

"Yes," Pansy said, not meeting her eyes.

"We'll go retrieve him," Tonks told Lukas. "It'll only be a moment. Let's go," she told Pansy.

As the two of them walked through the woods, Tonks was quiet.

"Are you mad at me?" Pansy asked. "For using Dark magic?"

"What? No," Tonks said firmly. "I'm just tired. And I wish you had stayed safe tonight. It was a trap, we think. They were just trying to get us out of the house to kidnap the kids. Holy shit!" she said, as they found the restrained man.

Whatever invisible bounds were restraining the man were cutting into his skin. Pansy looked away, but waved her wand, dropping him from the tree. "I didn't really mean too," she whispered. "I just…lost control."

"It's all right," Tonks said, floating the stunned man in front of them. "You're safe. That's all that matters."

"I'm not safe. None of us are," Pansy murmured.

Tonks sighed. "Well this is war, so I suppose you're right. I'm glad you're all right at the moment." She took Pansy's hand as they escorted the prisoner back to the house.


	14. Evil Angel II

_**LbN: Second to last chapter! Happy reading!**_

Pansy pulled on her jacket as she walked down the stairs to the mansion's meeting room. It was a black jacket, with silver bands around the cuffs—the jacket all of the resistance volunteers had. She rolled the sleeves down, covering the new tattoo she'd gotten the day after the attack. It wasn't like the Death Eaters' tattoos, it didn't summon her anywhere, but it was the group's mark. It was a Celtic star at the end of a wand. It almost covered her scar completely. Lukas had explained that the tattoos were specific to people who had bled for the cause. It was grim, and a bit creepy, but somehow Pansy was proud of being in the handful of people that had it.

"I still can't believe we're leaving," she said quietly as she stood next to Tonks.

"I know," Tonks said. "We have to get back though. So much has been happening that Kingsley and the rest of the Order think something's about to go down."

They had said goodbye to the rest of the group the night before. The kids were there now, and they hugged each of them.

"Be safe," Klaus said.

"Write to us," Sabrine told them.

"We will," Tonks said. "As soon as we can. Thank you both," she said to Anke.

"Stay safe. We'll look for your owl."

Tonks nodded and took Pansy's hand. "Ready?"

Pansy nodded. She followed Tonks to the Apparation point in front of the fireplace, and a second later felt the tugging sensation in her stomach. When she opened her eyes, they were standing in the middle of a dirt road. She could see a large house standing in the field about thirty yards away.

"Follow me, and take out your wand." Tonks said. "It's Kingsley's house." When they got to the front door, Tonks waved her wand over it and led them inside. There was a small meeting taking place when they made it to the living room.

"Evening ladies," Kingsley said. "Tonks, you know everyone?"

"Wotcher," she said, nodding at the group.

"We can make further introductions later," Kingsley continued. "Right now—"

"Is that the case?" one of the members asked, pointing at Pansy.

Pansy knew what he was talking about, but she still felt a little anger at being talked about. She was standing right there for crying out loud….

"This is Pansy," Tonks nodded. "It's okay, we can talk in front of her."

"How can we be sure?" the man asked.

"I'm telling you, aren't I?" Tonks asked in a harsh tone.

"Forgive me for not taking the babysitter's advice on this one…"

"She's okay, now let's get to work."

"I still don't believe you. Kingsley, I wasn't aware you allowed your Aurors to sleep with their charges…."

"You're out of line," Kingsley growled.

"Way out of line," Tonks snapped.

"And we're not sleeping together, you moron," Pansy said, reddening. "I know you don't trust me, but you shouldn't be a dick to Tonks."

"That's cute, she's defending you. Look, I don't care if you think she's changed. I'm not saying another word while she's here. She's a junior Death Eater, who still uses Dark Magic, if my sources are correct."

Pansy, having had just about enough, rolled up the sleeve of her jacket and stuck out her arm. "You see a Dark Mark?" she asked quietly.

"No," the man muttered.

"What do you see?"

"A Resistance Wand."

"I was trying to keep a wizard from kidnapping Lukas's boy, and I snapped. Yeah, I used Dark Magic, but I didn't mean to. It was the first thing that came to mind. I don't know how to get you all to believe I've changed, so I'm not going to try. Leave her out of it," she said, pointing to Tonks. She took a seat, fuming, and barely listened as Kingsley went over the information they'd retrieved. She perked up when they started talking about Death Eaters. Smirking, she listened, thinking that they were seriously overestimating most of them, with the exception of Bellatrix. They were definitely underestimating her. They failed to grasp how psychotic she was… "If you're dueling Alecto, you'll want to keep the area small. Back her into a corner or something. She needs a lot of room to be effective."

The group stared at her.

"What? I've seen most of them fight. I know their styles."

For the rest of the meeting, Kingsley would ask her about certain Death Eaters. The man who had questioned them when they'd first gotten in sneered at her the entire time, but she didn't care. She gave them what information she had, it was their decision if they used it or not.

"You sure these are all the weaknesses of the Death Eaters that you know of?" Kingsley asked.

"Yes."

"What about Bellatrix?"

"Stay away from her."

"Weren't you living with her?" Suspicious Man asked. "You don't know her weaknesses?"

"She doesn't have any. Just leave her alone. Or attack in a really big group." She got up and stretched as Kingsley called the meeting to a close. Not wanting to talk to anyone or be interrogated again, she lurked in the doorway as Tonks talked to Kingsley. She followed the metamorphmagus up to one of the spare rooms. "That was fun," she muttered.

"He's paranoid," Tonks said with a smile. "Everyone is, with things so crazy."

"So what are we doing now?" Pansy asked as they got ready for bed. "What's the plan?"

"We're going to hang out here, keep listening to Potter Watch. We're just waiting for the inevitable bomb to go off."

As Pansy snuggled into Tonks's side, she wondered when it would happen.

* * *

It happened the next day. Pansy was, unbelievably, running through the halls of Hogwarts less than 24 hours later. She dodged Death Eaters, students and spells as she tried to keep up with Tonks. The older witch was dueling, and looking for people at the same time. They ran outside, into one of the courtyards. It was strangely quiet out here, and cold.

"Tonks?"

"Shhh!"

The cold was overpowering, and Pansy knew, without looking, that a Dementor was behind them. "_Expecto Patronum_!" she shouted, at the same time as Tonks. Her eagle and Tonks's wolf chased it down, but Pansy didn't have time to celebrate. Before she had a chance to even look back at Tonks, someone grabbed her hair and tugged.

"Somehow, the fact that you've become close to my mudblood niece is worse than the fact that you went astray," Bellatrix said softly, close to Pansy's ear. "How much is your toy worth, little niece?" she asked Tonks.

"Let her go, Bellatrix," Tonks said quietly.

"As you wish," Bellatrix smiled, pushing Pansy toward Tonks.

Pansy shivered as Tonks caught her. "Don't fight her," she whispered.

"_Crucio!_" Bellatrix yelled.

Pansy pushed Tonks out of the way and dove behind a bench. She scraped her knee on the ground, but ignored it. After catching a small breath, she looked over the bench to see Tonks dueling Bellatrix. She tried silently disarming Bellatrix, but the older witch wiped the spell away as if it were a fly. She levitated Pansy and tossed her next to Tonks. Winded, but not hurt, Pansy got up and began dueling as well. They were no match for Bellatrix.

"_Sectumsempra_!" Bellatrix cackled.

"_Depulso_!" Pansy yelled, sending a stone bench flying into Bellatrix. She gasped as she looked down at Tonks. Abandoning her vow to not use Dark Magic, Pansy created a hurricane. Safe in the eye of the storm, she leaned down and healed Tonks's wounds as best as possible.

"Ahh!" Tonks yelped as Pansy helped her stand.

"We have to move!" Pansy called above the wind. She could see Bellatrix sending spells at the barrier between them. The wind wouldn't last, and they had to get out of there before it died down. She helped Tonks hobbled as quickly as possible through the stone arch, but Bellatrix was too quick. Pansy looked up as a neon blue spell ripped through the wind layers and cracked the ceiling. Bits of ceiling began to fall. Pansy pushed Tonks into the doorway as a chunk came down on her leg. Another piece hit her head, and everything went dark.

_**LbN: Send reviews please!**_


	15. Epilogue

_**LbN: Last chapter! I know it's been a long run, so thanks for sticking with me! Happy reading :)**_

Pansy woke up in the dark. Tonks was holding her, and there was still a bit of pain in her leg. She turned to say something, but Tonks put a finger to her lips.

The older witch wrote on the wall in glowing blue letters. _Death Eaters watching the hall behind us. Don't talk._

_**How many? **_

_At least three. You-Know-Who killed Harry. There's still a battle going on, but we have to get around these guys if we want to help fight. Or escape._

Pansy's stomach fell as she read those words. The savior of the Wizarding world was dead. But apparently all was not lost. _**Where are we?**_

_Still in the doorway by the courtyard. The rocks are blocking us in, but I guess the Death Eaters know that too, because they haven't opened the door. As soon as they leave, we can go in._

_**What's that? I hear yelling.**_ Pansy tightened her grip on Tonks as the ground quaked. A few of the rocks fell into the small space. They didn't have to wait long to find out what was happening.

"Giants!" one of the Death Eaters yelled. "Let's go!"

"We're not supposed to abandon our post!"

"If the giants are retreating that can only mean one thing. Let's get out of here before they find us."

"He's dead," Tonks whispered happily. "But how? I thought…"

The ground quaked again and Pansy struggled to her feet. "Come on, let's go find out." She pushed the door open slightly and, seeing a clear hallway, walked out. She could hear loud yelling from a long way off, but their part of the castle was silent. Her head throbbed and she closed her eyes for a second.

"Are you okay?" Tonks asked.

"My head's still hurting."

"Well, getting clobbered with stones will to that to you…."

"Let's just find a way out of here. I'm feeling dizzy." She led them through the dungeons, figuring that the area closest to Slytherin would, ironically, provide the safest passage since no one would be there. As they made their way into the main hall, her vision swam and she went weak at the knees.

"Easy!" Tonks said, catching her.

"Tonks! You're alright!" a voice said.

Pansy tried to concentrate, but her vision was going blurry again. She heard Tonks say something about the hospital wing, but that was the last thing she registered before fading into unconsciousness.

* * *

Waking up this time around was much more pleasant. There was light outside, she was lying comfortably in a warm bed, and the searing pain in her head and leg was gone. Pansy sat up slowly, feeling the bandage on her right temple. Looking down, she saw that her leg was completely healed. She was curtained in, but she could hear voices talking around her. She smiled when Tonks came in a second later. "Hey."

"Wotcher."

"What happened?" Pansy asked, unable to remember anything except their dark hiding space from the battle.

"Apparently, Harry came back from the dead and killed Voldemort," Tonks said, as if this was just a run of the mill day in her book.

"What?"

"I know. But that's what happened according to everyone."

"Did you find Remus?" Pansy asked, knowing how worried Tonks had been about her friend.

Tonks looked down as she sat on Pansy's bed. "He…he didn't make it."

"I'm sorry," Pansy said quietly.

Tonks nodded. "Molly Weasley killed Bellatrix."

"No way…"

"She did," Tonks said with a smile. "She's still signing autographs. Madame Pomphrey said you've got to stay here for a few more days, so I brought your things over."

"How long have I been out?"

"A couple of days. We were really worried at first, but you kept coming out of it. I have to go meet Kingsley," Tonks said, standing up. "I'll come back in about an hour. Here's your journal."

Pansy took it and leaned up to kiss Tonks. "Hurry back."

"I will."

* * *

Pansy's footsteps echoed through the quiet corridors of Hogwarts. Everyone except the people in the hospital had left by now. She quickly made her way to the owlry, wrapping her jacket around her, even though it was bright out. She still wasn't in perfect shape, and the long spell of being hurt, and then sick, had thrown her body completely out of whack. It was probably 80 degrees outside, factoring in the wind, but she was freezing. She shouldn't have been out at all, but she couldn't stand Pomphrey any longer. She'd slipped out when the nurse was otherwise occupied. Once inside the owlry, she whistled for one of the larger birds. The envelope she had was about thirty sheets of parchment thick, and she didn't trust the small owls. "Here you go," she said, giving it a treat. She tied the letter onto its leg and watched it soar out of one of the windows. Shivering a little, she decided to head back to the hospital wing.

* * *

"How about this one?" Tonks said, handing the magazine to Pansy.

Pansy looked at the apartment pictures and the floor plan before shaking her head. They'd been at this all morning. Since Pansy had earned herself another two days on bed rest with her little owlry run, Tonks had been occupying their time by getting her opinion on apartment choices. "It's too small."

"There's only two of us, and it's not like you need your own room anymore," Tonks countered.

"Tonks, that's smaller than what we were living in right off," Pansy said, flipping through the magazine. "What about that one?"

"How about I just buy us a house? Would that work?" Tonks asked sarcastically as she looked at the four-page spread for one apartment.

"It would actually."

"We're not all filthy rich," Tonks said laughing.

"Shut up. Your trust fund is bigger than mine."

"True. You win this time."

Pansy laughed and got out of bed. As she stretched she noticed Tonks looking at her. "What?"

"If Madam Pomphrey comes in, you're never going to leave this hospital."

"I'm fine," Pansy said, continuing her stretches. She walked around her little section of the room once before returning to bed. "There. Just needed a little exercise. Happy?"

"Sure. How about this one?" Tonks gave her the magazine again.

Pansy was about to concede to the apartment choice, when Madam Pomphrey opened the curtain.

"Your parents are here to see you."

"My parents?" Pansy asked. She sat up, knowing she didn't look too well, even though she felt better. She smoothed her hair down and sat up a little straighter.

"You want me to leave?" Tonks asked.

"No, stay with me. Please." She smiled as her parents when they came in. "Mom, Dad. I didn't know you were coming."

"It was your father's decision," Maxine said.

"We received your owl," Xerxes said. "If the intent was to make us feel sympathy—"

"It wasn't," Pansy said softly, but firmly. "I wanted you to know what happened, and that I made it through it."

"Yes, well, as I said, we read the journal entries you sent. We've decided that we will allow you to come home. Under some conditions, of course."

"And those are?"

"First, you must renounce your association with the Death Eaters, publicly."

"Think I've already done that, seeing as I was working for the resistance."

"Well people need to know that. We want you to make a statement."

"No one knows, or cares about me. I don't think that's necessary."

"We do," Xerxes said harshly. "We don't want your foolhardy actions tarnishing the family name. The second condition is that you work under me at the Ministry, so I can keep an eye on you. The third…" he broke off, throwing a glance at Tonks. "Whatever…phase you're in, consider it over. You are not allowed to associate with Miss Tonks any longer. It's nothing personal," he added, addressing Tonks now. "It's just that we're from a different circle, and Pansy shouldn't be seen to fraternize."

"Tonks saved my life, Dad," Pansy said, not believing her ears.

"And we're grateful, but still—"

"Spare me," Tonks said. "You'd be welcoming her back with open arms instead of a contract if you actually gave a damn. And, just so you know, I'm a direct descendant of the Black family, through my mother's side. My Wizarding ancestry goes back farther than yours does, Parkinson, so nose down."

"I'm not going to stop seeing Tonks," Pansy said. "The other two things, fine, but not that. I won't stop seeing her."

"Then we have no choice but to let you go," Maxine said. "And you can forget about your inheritance."

"Nice try," Tonks said. "She's had the money in her possession for over a year now. When she turned 18, she could've renewed the joint account, allowing you access, but she didn't. She couldn't have, since she was in hiding. You can't touch the money in her vault."

Maxine reeled back in shock. "How do you know about all of this?"

"When I got her from Azkaban, I made sure all of her possessions were safe," Tonks said, glaring at the woman.

Pansy's heart leapt at the older witch's words. It wasn't really about the money, she was just happy that Tonks had cared enough to look into those types of things.

"If you insist on being obstinate, and refusing our generous offer, we want nothing more to do with you," Xerxes said. "We'll leave you to your bed rest."

Pansy just stared as they left. "I didn't think it would feel like this," she mumbled.

"What do you mean?" Tonks asked, holding her.

"I just…I don't know. I didn't quite expect that."

Tonks turned slightly so she could look at her. "You won't regret your decision. I promise."

Pansy nodded and hugged the older witch. "I know."

_**Fin**_

_No, don't leave me to die here_

_Help me survive here, alone._

_Don't surrender_

_Surrender…_

_Put me to sleep evil angel._

_Open your wings evil angel._

_Fly over me evil angel._

_Why can't I breathe, evil angel?_

_~Breaking Benjamin  
_


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